Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
