I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
