before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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