rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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