That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize