and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Randomize
