is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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