You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Randomize
