I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
