quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
