Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  make any headway on the foot/dick situation?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): make any headway on the foot/dick situation? http://tfl.nu/ein6
  Replies (7) Good night (725) Bad night (2160)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night http://tfl.nu/ayrv
  Replies (34) Good night (1298) Bad night (6271)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed. http://tfl.nu/gx4g
  Replies (33) Good night (3226) Bad night (2485)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place... http://tfl.nu/dgik
  Replies (6) Good night (1402) Bad night (819)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad. http://tfl.nu/cg55
  Replies (4) Good night (1495) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there. http://tfl.nu/ryf1
  Replies (6) Good night (654) Bad night (1068)
• Favorite

  (807): View more from Ontario

  id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (807): id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday http://tfl.nu/24kf
  Replies (13) Good night (1278) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it. http://tfl.nu/wtlk
  Replies (8) Good night (2557) Bad night (700)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life http://tfl.nu/6fwv
  Replies (4) Good night (344) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this. http://tfl.nu/qdyt
  Replies (0) Good night (652) Bad night (418)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him http://tfl.nu/pxxc
  Replies (5) Good night (766) Bad night (684)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous. http://tfl.nu/j7wr
  Replies (4) Good night (691) Bad night (439)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin" http://tfl.nu/b2j2
  Replies (1) Good night (687) Bad night (402)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Why so serious bruh

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address. (778): Why so serious bruh http://tfl.nu/48qn
  Replies (1) Good night (446) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong. http://tfl.nu/uti0
  Replies (0) Good night (517) Bad night (285)

Randomize