Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.