We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
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