Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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