How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Sorry about my life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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