I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I need to align my fucking chakras
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
