So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
