I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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