Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
