Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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