i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
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I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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