I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just high enough for therapy.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
