Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
