Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
