I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
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i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
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Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize