i just sent this text using only my big toe
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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