Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
