dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize