So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
