Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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