i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
