i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
