It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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