return my video game
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
