drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
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Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
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Its not chugging if its just one gulp
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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