Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
