we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
