Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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