You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
