bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
