So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
