she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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