I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
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On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
You were trust falling into bushes
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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