Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
