Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I need to align my fucking chakras
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
