the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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