either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
