So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
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