his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
It's official drugs can't kill me
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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