wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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