I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
