So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
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I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
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Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
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Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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